Maternal Instinct

Wiping the sleepy eyes and looking at the rising sun through the window, Kashmi realized she was already late. It was getting tougher for her to stop worrying about her little baby at home and resist the urge to leave. But then, she knew she hasn't yest finished at work and might have to stay back until she's completed.

It's just one month since Kashmi gave birth to a baby girl. As a single mother with no one to look after, she had no other choice but to get back to work at the earliest. Following delivery, the day she felt she could move around without much difficulty, Kashmi got back to her routine. Had she chosen not to, she would starve and so would her newborn.

Every evening, as she left for job, she would leave the child with the old lady with whom she shared a small hut. The old lady, who once lived the life of Kashmi, would look after the kid until the mother took over and then leave to scavenge the near by town. In return, Kashmi was happy to share a part of whatever little food she could manage with the old lady.


In most cases, Kashmi is back home soon after the conical speakers of the nearby temple blurted out the ritual Suprabhatham. On reaching home, the first thing she would do was to put her sweet little baby girl to her breast.  

The sense of motherhood she felt as the baby suckled on those breasts, drowned her in a sense of well being and made her feel at the top of the world. This would help her forget all the hardships she faced in earning just enough to eat as much as she needed to nurse her baby.



Wanting to remain bonded for all the goodness of the world for ever and ever, she would change the baby from one breast to another and continue feeding until the baby is contented and slipped the supple nipple out of it's mouth. That's when she would surface back to the real world and have a peek at herself in the broken piece of mirror, which hung from the termite eaten wood that was once a door.

In the mirror, Kashmi would see an emaciated lady in her late twenties, comforting a baby girl, who is now sleeping peacefully in her lap.  Few inches from the baby, would be her skinny chest that appeared taunt by prominent ribs that held her motherhood in place. Her skin would have signs of trauma in various phases of healing, which she probably succumbed while at work. The next few minutes, she would recollect on the poverty that struck and the hard work she did, staring at it's evidence in the mirror.

The image would convey a lot of things to her. Sometimes, it would speak aloud of the dreams that she once weaved so fine and the way it shattered one dreadful day. But the satisfaction of being able to feed her child despite all that, would be the emotion that dominated her face. Perhaps today, that's what mattered more to Kashmi than everything else that she saw in the mirror.


It was that sense of fullness which she wants to feel again. And that's what is making her restless and wanting to get back to her child soon. But today, work seems to engage her over time. Though she gets payed for the extra hours she spends, it looked really tough to carry on with the thoughts of her child that kept returning back to her.

She knew she was tired and her body was sore from all the hard work she did until then. A part of her told her she should stop and leave, but she didn't want to miss the over time pay. May be that could help her afford a set of new baby cloths. Or may be she could even afford a mosquito net to protect her dear one. After all it's just a couple of hours more.

Before she could resolve the conflicts in her mind, her client stepped into the room. He was tall man with tough looks and dirty mustaches that dipped into his mouth as his lips parted to talk. "Well, I hope you are ready". Even before she perceived what has been just said, he pushed her into the couch and pounced on her.

Under him, she slowly drifted to the world that fed on her raw flesh that helped her to feed her child in turn.


99 comments:

  1. *speechless*
    I feel the cruelty of this world..and yet..
    Some feelings can't be just judged by me!
    Poignant piece of writing.
    (#respect)

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  2. I felt numb for a few minutes after reading the last para, don't know what to say. A mother can go to any lengths to provide a better life for her baby, only a mother can do that and nobody else. I applaud you Leo for writing this. :)

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  3. And no one can equal the love of a mother....

    u have penned it so wonderfully that it almost seems real.
    The concluding para truly left me speechless.

    sarah

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  4. You are such a sensitive soul, Leo. Such a sensitive soul. You are able to stand in her shoes or rather bare feet so well. So well written. My heart is so quiet now...

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  5. OMG...
    you broke us with that last paragraph.
    as akshay said, a mother can scale anything for her kids

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  6. That was a truly brilliant piece ! Maybe one of the best of your works . . I could go on and on reading it . . At first I thought it was just a subtle take on motherhood . . But then the ending came as a blow . . Remarkable one . .

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  7. That was a truly brilliant piece ! Maybe one of the best of your works . . I could go on and on reading it . . At first I thought it was just a subtle take on motherhood . . But then the ending came as a blow . . Remarkable one . .

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  8. Speechless.. D climax was too unexpected and just.. Well, I am in lack of words to explain it..

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  9. And then folks are amazed at the dark tones of humans. Cruel as it may sound, it could be happening even as we read it. You have beautifully captured the unconquerable love of a mother amidst ceaseless trampling.

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  10. I m touched by the way you have written this piece. One of the best posts I have read on motherhood.

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  11. The end was hard hitting. First of all, it's very painful for a mother to leave a child so small and go out to work. And when one's a single parent, they have no choice but slave away like this -- the child has to be fed; even if it means the mother is being fed upon. This is a very sad reality.
    Doc, another touching tale.

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  12. OH god.. such is the plight of a lot of mothers .. SAD SAD

    cruel world we live in

    Bikram's

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  13. So far this is one of the good and thought provoking story. The story whips us badly with the hard reality. Pls keep the going.

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  14. that was something exceptional one...superbly done... :)
    *blissful*... :)

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  15. got goosebumps after reading the story... its amazing

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  16. I kind of predicted the end but it was simply superb narration. Awesome!

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  17. A searing piece...involving and poignant! So well penned. Reality stings!

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  18. Beautifully written...lovely narration!Moved!

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  19. Speechless. You brought the mother side of a lady so beautifully and I wonder why we label people...

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  20. wow. i loved the narration. excellent piece.

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  21. A touching post-so many women are forced to lead such demeaning lives.

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  22. This is such a profound piece of writing. You have certainly touched our heart mate...loved the narration !!

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  23. Stumbled across your blog randomly. I find it abysmally amusing, so you've now got a new follower :)

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  24. its a heart touching story.
    it again rightly shows that a mother-child relationship is teh purest and deepest one.
    awesome. i love your writing style.
    you kept the reader engaged at every word. raw emotions difficult to portray but you did splendidly.!!!

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  25. Maternal instinct is amazing. Who can we really blame for such things in India. Really sad.

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  26. Leo, that was an amazing post! what the mother had to suffer to feed her child.

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  27. touched.. very well penned.. just not getting proper words to express what i felt after the reading post..

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  28. You are right man, totally right. World has different colours, to some its pleasure and to some others the same situation happens to be a matter of life and death.
    You are amazing Leo, just don't stop feel for others.

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  29. After a long time I visited your blog and read...believe me it is wonderful. Lock of my mind opened at the end of the story so I read it again and paid attention to every word...Believe me its awesome story...Lovley
    Keep writing:)

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  30. This is very sad,touching story......Had tears in my eyes...Harsh reality of some mothers.....Beautiful narration!!....

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  31. Truly, mother's love is unmatched and a mother will go to any extend to protect her child...

    A touching post, Leo!
    Nisha

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  32. Pains to see what people have to go through under extreme conditions. Very well written.

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  33. sensitive and tender....like mother's love

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  34. You left me speechless . . .

    So, a award is waiting for you. Check out here -
    http://liveuploud.blogspot.com/2012/07/something-awesome-and-sorry.html

    Ashwini

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Ashwini Dey for the nomination. :)

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  35. Nice illustrative lines. I must say that the words were far from real. They touched. But aren't Kashmiri women beautiful?

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Anoop. Kashmi is the name of the character. :)

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  36. aw... really sad and touching.

    Do stop by my blog sometime :)

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  37. A sad depiction of reality of some unfortunate mothers!

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  38. I've tagged you to a Liebster and an awesome blogger award :). Check this link : http://nehasjournal.blogspot.in/2012/07/two-in-one.html

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    Replies
    1. Thank you neha for the nomination. :)

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  39. Beautiful depiction of a mother's love for her child... but what a cruel twist of fate at the end!

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  40. Fantastic issues altogether, you just won a logo new reader. What might you suggest about your put up that you made a few days ago? Any sure?

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  41. Dear follower friend iam hear to say thanks for all support…ur support my success…Keep writing & reading…waiting to hear more…good luck…GOD<3U

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  42. The beauty of motherhood and the ugly truth of womanhood....Loved how you wrote this!!

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  43. hey u r nominated for Liebster Award here http://shvetasp.blogspot.in/2013/03/thank-you.html

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    Replies
    1. Thank you for the nomination shveta. :)

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  44. Hey keep posting such good and meaningful articles.

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